The Dreaded Day

A few days after Deacon was born

Tomorrow is a day I've dreaded since the day he was born...Deacon's first day of school.  I hate that my kiddos continue to grow up despite all my efforts to stop them. 

Hayden's first day of school wasn't near as difficult for me.  For those of you that know Hayden you know she was born ready for school.  She has always been a miniature adult. I remember when she was three years old having to come up with different activities just to keep her busy and content. By the time her first day of school rolled around, she was more than ready. Now, I did cry a little bit on the car drive home after I dropped her off for her first day of kindergarten, but I was okay. I wasn't the mess I am this time around.

Deacon is ready for school. He wanted to go to school last year with his big sister. Most days while she was at school he would ask when he could go to school. He's super excited about it. So, technically I should be okay and happy for him, right?  

No...I am so sad. 

I started crying a few weeks ago on my way to pick up the school supply list.  I tried to suck it up and put myself together before I got to the school. I mean seriously, what crazy person cries on their way to pick up a school supplies list? 

Today I have fought it all day long, but I lost the battle this evening around bath time. Ugh, what am I going to do tomorrow?!

I'd like to blame it all on the fact that I'm eight months pregnant and super hormonal/emotional. That makes me sound less crazy. However, I think I'd still be a basket case.

Side note:  Just in case you are worried/wondering, I am not crying in front of Deacon. I put on a happy face and act like I'm really excited for him when we talk about school. I'm not that awful.

Here's the part where I thought I'd sap it up a bit, (because I'm not being depressing enough) and add some old pictures of my baby.

Always, always the clown

He has a thing about putting anything on his head

It's not like I'm sending him off to college, but I'll miss my little buddy during the day. He loves to make me laugh as you can see from the above pictures.

This day Deacon wanted to hold my hand while we watched TV.

Deacon is also incredibly affectionate. At least once a day he climbs up in my lap, or sits right next to me on the couch.

Alas, I know I will survive. I just already hate tomorrow. I don't want to be the sad mom crying as she leaves her child's classroom. I never thought I'd be that mom, but it's looking more and more likely. Let's all just pray I can keep it together until I leave the parking lot!